cremation services offered in Macomb, MI

Helping Someone Who Has Lost a Child

After cremations as part of the cremation services offered in Macomb, MI, you may find that you are consoling a close friend or family member as they grieve the death of their child. All deaths of loved ones are followed by an intense grieving process that can last weeks, months, and, in some cases, years until the grief changes forms, always there, but not always raw and on the surface.

However, the overwhelming grief that parents experience when a child dies is usually more intense and lasts longer. Much of this grief centers on a future cut short: the what might have been of possibilities and expectations and the what will never be looms large and continually.

It is not uncommon for parents who have lost a child to be angry and to blame themselves, even if their child’s death was completely out of their control, for the death of their child because parents are supposed to protect their children from harm and that instinctive knowledge stays at the forefronts of their minds.

It can be difficult to comfort and console people when they’re angry and grieving, but it’s important that we hang in there with them, no matter how hard the road to healing is, because these grieving parents need us.

While everyone grieves uniquely and differently, there are some things we shouldn’t do and should do when we are proving support to parents who are grieving over the death of their child.

One thing is to not avoid talking about the child who has died. If people tiptoe around mentioning the deceased child, it can seem as if the child never lived and left no lasting impact on the world for the time they were in it. This can be very hurtful to the child’s parents. Remind the parents of the great things, including memories and stories, you remember about their child. Let them know that their child was and did and will not be forgotten.

Don’t disappear after a short time. It’s easy within a few weeks of a death that is not one of our own to get back into the hustle and bustle of life as if nothing ever happened. But for parents who’ve lost a child, there is no normal to return to. A new normal must be created and adjusted to, but that takes time and healing. Be sure to continue to be there for the grieving parents, whether you visit with them once a week or text or call every few days or just drop a meal off at their home.

Don’t pepper parents who have lost a child with well-meaning, but hurtful expressions such as “You’ve got time to have more children,” “Miscarriages are just nature’s way of correcting things,” “Stay busy to keep your mind off of things,” or “Well, at least you still have your other children.”

Do be loving and available to listen non-judgmentally to parents who have lost a child, no matter what the circumstances were surrounding the death.

Parents who have lost a child may not be emotionally prepared to plan a memorial service for their child. Ask if you can help, and if so, what kind of service they would like to have to honor the memory of their child.

For more information on grief resources as part of cremation services in Macomb, MI, our caring and knowledgeable staff at Lee-Ellena Funeral is here to assist you. You can visit our funeral home at 46530 Romeo Plank Rd., Macomb, MI 48044, or you can call us today at (586) 412-8999.